Mean Girls, Part Two

You may or may not remember the trouble Miss M had with a mean girl at cheerleading this fall.

If not, this post http://beingbrenda.blogspot.com/2008/08/mean-girls-mean-girls-what-ya-gonna-do.html will remind you.

Well, to try and make a long story short - this girl ended up in class with Miss M this year.

And just before Christmas, hubby and I made a trip into the school to talk with the teacher, as the mean girl was getting physical with Miss M.

In the back of the line between classes, while walking in back of her chair in class, outisde at recess. You know, when the teacher and aides are busy elsewhere.

Now I'm not talking tripping, pushing or punching - but pressure points and unwarranted flicks and nudges.

Miss M had told this girl to leave her alone. The mean girl replied to Miss M "Shut Up" and walked away.

Anyway, since the holidays, I thought, as did Miss M, that this girl had left her alone. No more pressure points, nudges, etc.

But now, Miss M's friends have told her what this girl is saying about Miss M - behind her back.

Things like, "M has an attitude and shouldn't be allowed in Catholic school" , M is too white and fair - what's wrong with her?", and "Why does M shake her butt so much when she walks - especially up to take Communion?"

Now, I know at home Miss M can have a slight attitude. But I have never been informed of her being unpleasant by anyone - teachers, aides, other parents, students, volunteers. And I am at the school enough to know the teachers would pull me aside if this were the case.

As for Miss M shaking her butt when she walks - well maybe she does a little, but it's the way she walks all the time - not just up to Communion. And why the hell is this girl watching Miss M walk up to Communion when she should be reflecting in the sacrament she is getting ready to or has just received?!

Now for the second comment - Miss M being too white and fair. We are Irish and German. Most Irish and Germans are fair skinned. And last time I checked, this was known as being intolerant, racism. The kids are learning in school about World War II, you know the one where Hitler prosecuted the Jewish people due to their religion? And looking different. And what about when they studied the Civil War - where African Americans were sold into slavery.

Well, evidently, the teachers have had enough of the bullying that is going on in 5th grade. Miss M's class and the other 5th grade were pulled together for a 2 hour meeting with the principal.

All students who felt bullied were encouraged to give examples, without names, to the group. All students were given a piece of paper to write down the names of who was bullying them or who they have observed bullying others. The principal commented that the same FOUR names were showing on the papers and then discussed how to handle bullies. Then each student had a one on one chance to talk with the principal to discuss specifics and names.

I totally agree with this. Miss M did a good job in telling the principal what had been going on. And her friends told the principal what this girl is still saying about Miss M behind her back.

What I don't agree with is the fact the the entire 5th grade is now forced to walk between classes, to and from the lunchroom in silence. They are to get their lunches and return to their classroom to eat in silence. Then they have recess in the classroom in silence.

Why would the teachers punish the entire class instead of the four bad seeds?! I am not an educator by profession so PLEASE - someone help me to understand why this is a good method?

The school handbook has a section that deals with bullying. How it will not be tolerated.

Isn't the best way to deal with the few bullies to DEAL with the bullies?! Not punish the whole class?

Remove the bad seeds, that's what I say.

Anyhoo...that's my venting about this whole bullying situation. If anyone has any insights or comments to help me see it any other way - please share!

til next time, I'll still be...

Being Brenda