Anyone know where to find my husband's evil twin?

Not really a twin....but definitely evil.

Seems someone has gotten my husband's debit card numbers, our address and has been having some fun.

We noticed some suspicious holds on our account over the weekend.

The bank was SO (not) helpful.

Until the holds actually come through our account we can do nothing.

In the meantime, we have had two packages delivered to our house.

One is from a company that has a hold on our account.

The other is a totally different company.

The wierd thing is, it is hubby's name, our address, but different phone numbers.

(If someone wanted to buy stuff on our account...why would they have it shipped here?)

Unless they know we are typically not home when UPS delivers to our block.

Which is the case most days - but today my neighbor, who is usually at work, was home and signed for the boxes and stayed outside until hubby got home. (One of the boxes is rather large)

Needless to say - we have spent hours on the phone trying to sort this mess out.

The Bank still cannot do anything about the fraudulent charges as they haven't actually hit our account yet.

So, we have to close out our debit cards and get new ones.

But can I tell you how inconvenient this is.

Not only with the typical stuff of having to put alerts on our account, and close cards, etc.

It just so happens that this week, this week, I have MAJOR shopping to do for a school fundraising event.

Now I typically do all my shopping with my debit card. I rarely have more than $20 in cash on me.

So now, I will have to carry enough cash - or continue to hit a bank to cash checks.

So anyway, if anyone sees the evil twin....get my hubby's identity back.

Til next time, I'll still be...(hopefully the only one)

Being Brenda

Quiet Time

Finally, time to myself.

Not to sound selfish - but we have had a busy weekend with rain, car troubles, two sleepovers (at our house) and two football games.

I am just now getting some "me time".

I don't get uninterrupted "me time" often.

And I have nothing glamorous happening during "me time"...just a clean house (well, okay - first floor) , kids are in bed, hubby is at work, and all volunteer responsibilities are packed away.

I love my kids and hubby - but I look forward to this kind of night.

No one needing my attention.

No one changing the TV channels constantly.

No flyers to create or fundraisers to plan.

And time to do whatever I want to do.

So - my choice of things to do tonight is odd for me.

I am watching, and enjoying the Eagles/Dallas football game. (E-A-G-L-E-S, EAGLES!!)

But I am doing this mainly because I do not have a great book to read.

I love to read, and typically always have something waiting to be read.

Lately, I've been reading John Sanford (detective novels) - but would like to expand my horizons.

Maybe a biography, or something else - where I can learn something new about history, a person, the world, or even myself.

So, I need some suggestions. What you've been reading, and what you enjoyed about the book.

Maybe then I won't spend forever in Barnes & Noble.

Til next time, I'll still be...

Being Brenda

Gatorade and Ramen Noodles

This is what my diet has consisted of since Tuesday night.

I, somehow, have contracted this darn stomach bug that's (supposedly) going around. I haven't actually heard of anyone else having this - but my dear friend MiShelly says it's going around.

So, I will believe that somewhere, someone else feels as wretched as I have felt for the last two days.

Normally, I can continue about my normal routine of caring for the house and kids while sick.

Not.This.Time.

It took all I had to get the kids up and ready for school on Wednesday. (Of course, hubby was working, so I had no choice.) I managed, somehow - to drive them to school without getting sick. (I also opted for the drive-through line drop off for the first time this year. Miss M was in charge of helping Drewby out of the van and making sure to close the door.)

I then proceeded home - laid down on the sofa - and stayed there. All day. (Well, there and the bathroom)

Hubby handled Miss M's field hockey practice last night, and I did actually cook for the rest of the family. (I did eat a little of the homemade mac-n-cheese I made for them, and regretted it all night long!) Then I spent the rest of the night in bed.

It always amazes me that hubby cannot get the two kids ready for school in the morning. Three mornings a week - when he is working - I manage to get the kids up, showered (if needed), dressed, fed, lunches packed, and out the door by 7:40am. Alone.

This morning, he did get them both up. Then proceeded to wake me up - to monitor Drewby in the shower. And help Drewby get dressed. Oh, and can I go downstairs and pack their lunches and finish making breakfast.

Hubby does try his best. He is just not a well-organized morning person. Maybe it comes from him working odd shifts, and being really out of it on mornings he is home.

I helped him out this morning. And proceeded right back to bed.

Hubby has Miss M and Drewby at cheerleading and football practice right now. I have continued my Gatorade and Ramen Noodle diet.

I must be feeling better because I have cruised blogland and am actually writing this. Hopefully tomorrow I will feel normal and be able to eat real food again (because food is one of my favorite things!)

Til next time, I'll still be....

Being Brenda

Labor Day Weekend

This weekend has been a whirlwind of activities.

Saturday we took the kids to the Real Pirates! exhibit at the Franklin Institute in Philly.

Drewby is really into pirates and knights right now.

The Real Pirates exhibit is about a pirate ship, the Whydah Gally, which was located off Cape Cod. There were actual cannons, guns, and pirate treasure on display.

Drewby was fascinated with the artifacts, and the fact the youngest pirate was 8 or 9 years old.

He definitely sees this as an alternative to playing football or going to school. He now has the pirate bandana, eye patch and telescope. He's all set.

Miss M liked the exhibit, but was more into the other exhibits at the Franklin, including the Sports Challenge, where her softball pitch was timed at 22 MPH. (And that wasn't even a good pitch.)

We trekked all over the Franklin, and even hit a show at the Fehls Planetarium. However, after the show, we found out the Franklin closes at 5pm.

I suppose I should have known what time the Franklin closed, but - I didn't.

And I had promised Drewby we could see the train exhibit after the planetarium show.

Did I mention the one other thing Drewby really likes is TRAINS?!?!

Needless to say, the entire drive home, as well as all evening, I had to hear how we missed seeing the trains.

Not that the kids were ungrateful for the day, or had a bad time. They just both chose to focus on what we didn't see - instead of what we did see. (I know, they take after me - as I also tend to look toward the negative and need to try harder to focus on the positive)

(Okay, I started this post Saturday night, then fell asleep - so here's the rest of the weekend's events!)

Sunday, we were once again helping my brother-in-law and his wife, by watching their 21-month old son. He only works weekends, and she is on bed rest, pregnant with twins.

So I made a big pan of lasagna and we spent the afternoon and evening at their house playing with our nephew. Once he was safely in bed around 8:30pm, our shift was over, as my brother-in-law gets home around 11:30pm.

It was a good day, and I know they truely appreciate our help.

The Monday we travelled from one end of the county to the other end, and back home.

We started at home, and just had to stop at Chik-Fil-A for the free chicken strips to anyone wearing a football logo. Miss M and Drewby each wore one of Drewby's football jerseys, and my hubby wore his Cardinals football t-shirt. I was the odd one (but I only really wanted a sweet tea anyway)

From there, we went to hubby's other brother's house for thier youngest sons 3rd birthday.

Hanging with the out-laws, um I mean in-laws, is never one of my favorite things to do. (But that is for an entirely different post)

So, we did the hubby's family for lunch, cake, and presents. (3hours and 17 minutes - start to finish)

Then we left and headed for my mom's house - Lizzie's. She had invited us over for each day of the weekend, and we had other things going, so Monday I was determined to get to see her. (Both for me and the kids)

When we pulled up - Kiki was there too, along with her girlfriend Kaleah. The kids and I were so excited!

I can't tell you the last time the kids saw Kiki, and I hadn't seen her since Neil Diamond.

So we all hung out, and ate a great meal - thanks Mom! - and just relaxed.

I love getting together with my family. And hubby doesn't mind to much either. He has pretty great in-laws (not out-laws, like I have)

Having Kiki back home from California (she lived there for 3 1/2 years) has been great. While she does live 2 hours away - it is so much better than having her across the country. We've gotten to go to the beach with her, and just hang out at mom's. Plus she will get to see the kids action in their various sports.

So that was our weekend - the kids didn't want to leave mom's house, but school was back in session today, and they needed showers and to get to bed.

We did make plans for all of us to go to the PA Renaissance Faire in October.

I figure, Drewby's gotten to see all about pirates - why not let him go see knights! And the Ren Faire to such a cool place - and Drewby has never been there. In fact, Emily hasn't been there in 6 or 7 years.

That's all for our weekend....

Til next time, I'll still be...

Being Brenda

Updates

This is just going to be a quick update, because I am still feeling pretty down - and I am exhausted to boot!

On the puppy watch - hubby still says it's a no go to get Drewby a pug puppy for his birthday. I have not given up yet. I have until November!!

Couponing is going okay. I don't have much of a coupon stash yet - so I am limited in my savings. Last week my total was $3.55 in coupon savings. More was saved due to Club Card savings, but I don't have that total in my head right now.

My hubby has not yet decided what to do about his BFF's wedding in October. It has been decided - mutually - that the four of us as a family are not going. He may fly down to Florida for two days to go - but will not do Disney.

Miss M has handled the mean girl well so far this year. The cheerleading coach has separated them, and Miss M steers clear of this girl both in school and at cheerleading.

And yes Diamonds are forever. The Neil Diamond concert was FAB-U-LOUS!! He put on quite a show - sang all our favorites (Forever in Blue Jeans - mine, Cracklin'Rosie - Kiki's, and I Am I Said - Lizzie's) Then the three of us had an enjoyable evening out.

That's all for the update....

Til next time, I'll still be...

Being Brenda

I Am Defeated

I had such high hopes for things I wanted to accomplish this week.

With the kids back in school, I would have my days free to work on the short (and not-so-short) list of things needing to be done around the house.

I would have been content accomplishing (to the finish) just one.

Now would be a good time for me to fess up to some things:

I am a perfectionist.

I suffer, in cycles, from moderate to severe depression.

I am prone to anxiety attacks.

All in all, things have been going along well. I've not had any days of not being able to get out of bed in awhile. My last anxiety attack was just after the 4th of July. Almost two months.

And trust me - the perfectionism must come in waves because with getting ready for the kids to start school, the house in is dissarray.

So, Monday came. I missed the kids being home, running around, and being needed 24/7. I kept busy, but wasn't focused.

Nothing on the list was accomplished.

Tuesday, I had an appointment with my therapist - who has me looking for the positive in situations. Tuesday was also hubby's days off - so he and I went for a 4 mile nature walk. Here's the positive - I spent some wonderful quiet time with hubby.

Another positive from Tuesday - I'm positive nothing on the list was accomplished.

Today - I had nothing scheduled. I was taking today to accomplish something on the list.

Nope - volunteer responsibilities for the kids' school crept into the day. As fundraising coordinator for the school, an upcoming event needed attention. I did accomplish those items; however, my short-list sits next to me - with nothing crossed-off or finished.

With activities and running each night of the week, I would like my days to be more controlled, organized.

So, I am beginning to feel defeated. On a course set by someone other than me - and not in a good way.

I don't like feeling defeated, and down - and I really have to try to snap out of it or I will be on a course for a rough spell with many down days.

Look for the positive.

I walked 4 miles this week. (Good for the heart and body)

I spent quality time with my hubby. (Good for the heart and marriage)

I got to write this out - which has helped a little, because in starting this I couldn't think of anything positive in the week.

Hopefully, to anyone reading this, it didn't bring you down too.

Til next time, I'll still be...

Being Brenda

How much is that puppy in the window?

Drewby has always been in love with dogs.

Big dogs, small dogs.

Quiet dogs, yippee dogs.

Even stuffed dogs (he has four stuffed dogs - one is as old as he is. He got it when he was born and it is still his favorite)

He has been asking for a puppy dog for half of his life...no lie. He's six - so it's been 3 years.

At first we told him no because the dogs he wanted we too large for our small house.

Plus Miss M has a fear of most all dogs - she was bitten - twice- when she was 2.

Lately, his requests have been for smaller dogs.

King Charles Spaniel...smaller, but expensive.

Boston Terrier...smaller, but needs lots of yard to run around.

Well, the other night at Miss M's cheerleading practice, one of the families brought one of their pug puppies.

I had never actually seen a pug in person before.

This puppy was too cute. Small, laid back, doesn't require a lot of excercise (great for a small yard).

Even Miss M liked the pug pup.

The pug pup let Drewby pet him, Drewby let the pug lick him.

Drewby was in heaven. (I was, as usual, a little grossed out. I don't like dogs licking my face)

He then, very causually, looks at the mom and asks,

"How much did the puppy cost?"

After explaining to Drewby this was not an appropriate question, I did talk with the mom about the benfits and concerns with pugs.

I am convinced this would be the perfect dog for Drewby.

At 6 years old, he is starting to spread his wings and want some independence and responsibility. He does small chores and likes to help out whenever he can.

I look at this as a wonderful opportunity to provide him with a lifelong pal, but also a way for him to show his maturity.

There is One. Small. Problem.

My hubby. He wants no animals while we live in this small house, with a very small yard.

He is convinced he will be the one walking the dog, feeding the dog, and cleaning up after the dog.

I am not so sure.

Drewby has asked every single night since he first saw the pug, if he can please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please get a puppy.

He has told me he will take it for walks, and feed it, and play with it. And it can even sleep with him.

I think, no, I know Drewby will rise to the occasion if he were to get a dog.

He has waited half his life for us to say yes - he can have a dog.

It would make him so proud to know that he is responsible for the dog.

And, even though that means my baby boy is growing up, I think that is a good thing.

So, I have undertaken the huge job of convincing my dear hubby that we should, either for his birthday or Christmas, go ahead and get Drewby a pug puppy.

I will let you know how I make out.



Til next time, I'll still be.....



Being Brenda

Back to School Time

I cannot believe summer is coming to an end.

Miss M and Drewby will be starting school on Monday.

Class lists came out, school supply and uniform shopping has been done.

Last year, we decided to forego the cheap "character" backpacks for the kids and invest in really good backpacks. And it was a good decision. Both Miss M's and Drewby's backpacks are in great shape still.

That is not good news to a 10-year old.

Backpacks - to my Catholic school, uniform wearing children - are the equivalent of name-brand clothes to public school students.

I had no idea.

Miss M is horrified that someone will notice she is using the same backpack from last year.

Here was the conversation:

Miss M: "Can I get one of these backpacks for school?"

Me: "No, we bought you a good backpack last year and it is still in good shape."

Miss M: "Please Mom?"

Me: "No, you're using your backpack from last year."

Miss M: "Are you serious?"

Me: "Yes, I'm serious. You're backpack is still fine."

Miss M: "You know, I will be, like, the only one using the same backpack. All the cool backpacks are like this (holding up a backpack the looks very similar in style - just a different color/pattern to what she already has - with a price tag of $59.99)"

Me: "Well, I'm sorry honey but that's just the way it is. Your backpack is in fine shape."

Miss M: "You so don't get it. This is the cool backpack - I will look stupid with my old backpack."

Me: "You will not look stupid."

Miss M: "Whatever. You don't get it."


Maybe I don't get it.

But we had spent almost that much on her backpack last year - with the intention that it would last for two years.

And she knew that. She spent hours (well, maybe not hours, but a long time) picking out her current backpack.

We also still had new uniforms to purchase for both Miss M and Drewby, as well as both school shoes and sneakers. (Miss M has moved up into skorts and polo shirts from the jumper dress.)

So I was staying firm on no new backpacks.

Then I got to thinking about back to school shopping when I was a kid.
(I went to public school.)

I always looked forward to that shopping day - the new jeans (I remember my first pair of Jordache jeans), new tops, and sneakers.

I always had an entire new outfit on the first day of school.
(My mom probably still has all those pictures)

Miss M and Drewby have not ever had that experience. Going out and shopping for a whole new "wardrobe".

Each summer, we go to one store - the uniform store, and buy clothes that look exactly like what everyone else in the school will be wearing.

They have other clothes too, but we purchase things here and there.

Never all at once.

So now Miss M has asked for a pair of Marc Echo Red sneakers.

They're a new name brand. Vanessa Hudgens wears them - or, at least does in the commercials.

The equivalent of Nikes when I was in school. And I remember my first pair of Nike's too.

So, I guess I do get it.

Since we skipped the new backpack, and she needs new sneakers anyway...Miss M will be getting a pair of Marc Echo Red sneakers.

I only hope she's allowed to wear them to school.

Maybe she will remember the day she got her first pair of Marc Echo Red's - just like I remember my first pair of Jordache jeans and Nike sneakers.


Til next time, I'll still be....

Being Brenda

Mean Girls, Mean Girls, What Ya Gonna Do?

Miss M has encountered a Mean Girl.

You know the type. Smile at your face, stab you in the back. Do what I say - or it's lights out!

I knew it was coming. She is, after all, 10 years old. Going into 5th Grade.

And (mean) girls will be (mean) girls.

This girl got in my daughter's face, and told her she was going to punch her lights out if Miss M doesn't "hang" with her at cheerleading.

Miss M only told me this week because cheerleading starts and she doesn't want to cheer all of a sudden. When I asked why, I got the story.


This girl asked Miss M if she was cheering again. Miss M said "Yeah". So this girl says to M, "Well, you better hang with me at cheerleading, and not ....(another girl)....or I will punch you in the face." (so not in a kidding voice - according to Miss M) And then walks away.


Now, Miss M has cheered for three years. She loves being allowed to yell, and jump, and - even better - climb up onto someone else and jump off of them!! (That's for another story)

So her not wanting to cheer bothers me.

But more importantly - having someone bully my daughter - in any way, shape or form- is so not okay with me.

I have talked with Miss M and told her to tell this girl "I don't answer to you. I answer to my parents, and God"

But Miss M is still afraid. What if this girl punches her?

What do I tell her? "Let her hit you, she will get in trouble."

(Yes, I know that's what I should tell her.)

But - and this is the mama lion in me - I want to tell my daughter - hit her right back.

Stand up for yourself. (Really, if I ever see this bully hit my daughter - someone better hold me back)

I know Miss M wouldn't hit this girl.

(Neither would I. But the parents better watch out)

Miss M will cheer. I talked with the cheerleading coach who will keep the two separated. (last year they stood side by side - same height)

That has made Miss M feel better.

I have also told her again..."No one can tell you to do something you don't want to do. You have the power to control your actions. You must listen to your parents, teacher, and God."

Then - in some light of wisdom from above - I told Miss M, if she gets in your face - be the bigger person.

Tell her - "You cannot tell me what to do. I am tired of you getting in my face. Leave me alone"

And walk away.

Now I need to remember to be the bigger person, and let Miss M fight her own fight.

Til next time, I'll still be

Being Brenda

DIAMONDS are forever!

I am too excited!!

Tomorrow night - I will be sitting at the Neil Diamond concert with my mom and sister!!

Who doesn't know - and sing along to - Sweet Caroline, I Am I Said, America, Forever in Blue Jeans and so many others?

I cannot wait to be there.

My sister and I are Neil fans, because our mom was a Neil fan. And we have a very cool mom - always did - just didn't always admit to knowing it.

We were raised listening to his songs....mom danced around, and so did we. At times, we rolled our eyes as she embarrassed us. But we remember those times like they were yesterday, and each and every word to his songs.

We are planning a whole day event too. I am meeting my mom at her house a little after noon and we are driving together to my sister's house. We will all get ready together - then go to dinner before the show. We are spending the night at my sister's house as well.

My hubby is working this weekend, so he arranged for the kiddies to be with his parents, until Sunday afternoon.

So I get to spend this extra-ordinary day and night with my mom and my sister. Me, Lizzie (mom), and Kiki(sister).

I even took time for myself these past two days. Yesterday, I bought a new, too cute black and white top to wear with black pants. Tonight, I gave myself a mani-pedi!! Bright red polish now adorns my finger and toenails!!

After all, no one can go see Neil without getting a little dressed up!! I will wear my silver strappy heals, and put on a little bling just for the occasion. Anyone who knows me, knows I spend most of my time in jeans, shorts, sweats, and t-shirts. Except for Sunday church, but it is still nothing like tomorrow night.

But tomorrow night is special. I am spending time with two of the most amazing women I know. It will be a celebration of us. How far each of us has come in life. Knowing we are always there for each other. Supporting each other - in our times of joy, struggles, and triumphs. Being honest, both in praise and criticism - to make one another aware, better, and stronger.

Lizzie and Kiki are special. Without them, I would be - lost. They are my sounding board, my support, my lifeline, where I go to vent, for advice, for reassurance. And I know I provide that to them as well.

Tomorrow night, we will celebrate us.

And Neil of course, because Diamonds are Forever!!


Til next time, I'll still be.....

Being Brenda

Mini-cation

We are blessed to have a beach "house" available to us whenever we want to use it. I place the "house" in quotes as it is really a 30' travel trailer with a permanent addition. It is located is a great little, gated campground located 10 minutes from two popular beach towns. It is about a 2 1/2 hour drive from our home.

Earlier this summer, I spent an entire day preparing from me and the two kids to head to the beach house for a month. My hubby works nights, and gets a lot of overtime in the summer, so it is easier for me and him for me and the kids to be at the beach house. Plus, he is not really a beach or campground person.

So today, I once again spent an entire day getting ready to head to the beach, this time all four of us, plus my mom (she owns the place). The only difference, we are only going for three days.

I have to ask myself: is it really worth this effort for three days?

I have to get the laundry done, all 5 loads - so I don't come home to it. (But it has been there all week)

With the kids home all day, breakfast, lunch and dinner had to be made. And all the dishes cleaned up. (I cannot believe the amount of dishes a family of four makes dirty in one day). I would use paper plates if my children were not so environmentally aware!

And now here I still am trying to gather clothing, shoes, bathing suits and towels for out trip.

I am not trying to be unappreciative or ungrateful for what we have, it just seems like a lot for three days.

And now my daughter has informed me that she will go the the beach if she has to, but she will not go in the ocean. (See Fact of the Day from earlier post for her reason why!)

I know we will have a great time once we get there. Having my mom in the van on the way down will definitely make the trip somewhat easier. She will help keep the kids from the constant nagging: "She's looking at me", "He's touching my seat", etc, etc, etc. However, having mom in the car adds at least one stop midway to the beach for a bathroom break. She claims the kids need to stop as well. (Funny, they never need to stop when it's just me with them)

My son will be in heaven since daddy will be along this time. When I had the two kids at the beach alone, by son told me he wanted daddy to be there because "He's the funner parent". This simply meant he would take my son out into deeper water. I couldn't do that since my daughter wanted to stay in the sand.

Additionally, the kids get a certain freedom at the campground they don't have here at home. With it being a small, gated community, I allow them to ride their bikes to the playground (walkie-talkie and cell phone in tow). They have made friends from different areas of the state, and have no responsibilities like at home - no making beds, emptying the dishwasher, or running the vacuum. We will have a campfire, make s'mores and have some old-fashioned family fun.

This will also be our last chance for a weekend get-away before back to school and football and cheerleading start.

So, I will answer my own question: yes, all today's work is worth it for a three day mini-cation. I get to relax and spend quality time with my family. And that's what summer is all about!

Fact of the Day:

I read somewhere (can't remember where) the word "ALMOST" is the longest word in the English language that has all it's letters in alphabetical order.

Til next time, I'll still be

Being Brenda